013 Down to Last Klonopin Pill

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The original post for this daily diary began HERE.

March 9, 2010
013

It's been 4 months since I've updated this blog on what's going on with me and the benzodiazepine withdrawal. I have 7 months left to go until I'm benzo free. This past week, I got down to my last .5 mg pill (I began tapering about 2 1/2 years ago off 3 mg.).

I am wanting off this drug so badly, I'd just about give anything to be off it. I'm water titrating with 250 ml of water and removing 1 ml a day. I was using 200 ml for the past 6 days, but the withdrawal symptoms have been so bad this past week using that amount that I can't stand the pain, anxiety, paranoia, tremors and all the fun things that go along with being addicted to this nasty medication.

My prayers are still that doctors will have their eyes opened to what they are doing to people every day by giving them these horrible medications. Why not ask them about nutrition, check for hormone imbalances and vitamin and mineral deficiencies? I realize there's not much money in doing the right thing, but at least the patient wouldn't end up addicted to a medication which causes these symptoms.

Anyway, enough of my rant against prescription drugs and the doctors who give them. By my calculations, I will be off the Klonopin in 224 days which will be around my son's 22nd birthday. Now that is something to celebrate!

Tamara Slack

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Resources for my Supplements, Toiletries, Foods, Videos, Books

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So many people have called or emailed asking where I get my supplements, what do I use instead of makeup and shampoo so I don't get toxins and hormones into my body from the storebought stuff, and how much it costs to deal with my illness. So, I am posting it all in one blog post so that the resources can be found here. So here goes:

SUPPLEMENTS (vitamins, minerals, herbs, glandulars, etc.):


ConcenTrace Mineral Drops I use 60 to 70 drops per day. The link to this only shows the product. I don't buy it from Amazon because I can get is straight from local health food store for $18.99.


Isocort I am currently tapering off this glandular and will slowly start using ACE (Adrenal Cortical Extract) under my doctor's supervision. I purchase the Isocort from Natural Healthy Concepts online for $28.00 and get free shipping with their minimum purchase requirement.


ACE (Adrenal Cortical Extract) $32.00 from Clymer. I have not started this product, but will this week to replace the Isocort. It's an adaptogen so it will help me make cortisol when I need it and lower it when I don't need it.

Vitamin E (Unique E) is $40.50 from Clymer. I've looked all over for a better price, but this is it! And this is by far the best Vitamin E I can find.

Magnesium Malate I use both this product and a transdermal magnesium for now. I might switch to transdermal completely, but then I'll be missing the malic acid for my fibromyalgia. I use 3.5 tablets of this product daily, but get about 1,000 mg. more from the transdermal, so I'm loaded up on magnesium! From Natural Healthy Concepts for $5.39 each bottle and there's free shipping when I order $50 or more at a time from them.


Ancient Minerals Magnesium (the transdermal magnesium). I don't actually get mine from their website. There's a seller on eBay who sells it for the same amount but free shipping. $55.00 for the flakes and more for the acutal "oil" which is just pure water. I really want to get the book, "Transdermal Magnesium Therapy" by Mark Sircus. If anyone has a copy and wants to let me borrow theirs, let me know!


Pregnenolone Pure Encapsulations I'm taking 2o mg of this now, but started out the first 5 weeks on only 10 mg. It costs about $20.00 for a 3 month supply for me.

Seriphos $20.00 for each bottle of 100 capsules. This is the most expensive of the products I buy. My husband and I found that the best price is if we get it at Natural Healthy Concepts because if we buy 3 or 4 bottles at a time, we get free shipping and the bottles are a tad cheaper anyway. My doctor had me start using about 5 of these a day for panic attacks (adrenaline rushes from my HPA not working properly) and insomnia. We've moved me up slowly to 15 capsules a day (sometimes I need only 9), but it's something that has helped me get off the benzodiazepine and help with sleep and panic attacks. And just imagine... it's all natural. God made it... fancy that huh? I have had no problems with this company and wish I could buy all my supplements through them! If I'm not well, I need about 450 of these capsules a month which means over 4 bottles of it. As my HPA Axis calms down more (hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal Axis), I'll be able to use a lot less of this product.


Symplex F by Standard Process This has been a great product for me to help heal the hormonal problems and support for my adrenal glands. The doctor has me taking 3 each day. Found that I get 2 weeks free if I buy it in bulk from Amazon for $49.50 plus shipping.

Pantothenic Acid my doctor has me taking 3,000 mg. a day to balance my hormones. It's just Vitamin B-5, but has been helpful. I was buying it at the local health food store, but my doctor is sending me a bottle of what they have because it has ingredients that are more helpful (apparently more of something I'm neeeding in it). The cost is higher, so I'll see if I can get the same brand elseshere unless his is the least expensive.

Thymuril I cannot say enough about this product for me! We are even getting my husband on it. It's boosted my immune system greatly. If I could get only a few products into my system, this would be at the top of my list for sure. I found the best place to get mine is through PlanetRX for $11.14 for each bottle (they have free shipping with a minimum order too). I use 3 tablets or 6 capsules (the tablets have twice the amount of supplements in it). I am not struggling nearly as bad with chemical sensitivities now whereas before the Thymuril, I coulnd't breathe, my chest would tighten, and I would get very dizzy and confused if I even smelled perfume, much less nasty soaps and bleach!

Vitamin C Buffered 500 mg. I am trying to find a good Vitamin C, but for now, I have een using what my doctor has which is a buffered Vit. C for $13.50. I'm taking about 2,000 mg. a day of Vitamin C to boost my immune system.


Vitamin D Thorne D-5000 60 Capsules for $12.00 is what I use. Doctor has me taking 10,000 IU a day. This is good for my Calcium and Magnesium and helps with depression caused by hormonal problems.

Licorice Root Powder $16.00 to raise my cortisol in the mornings to "get going." Nice instead of coffee. This is organic and tastes great. One bottle lasts me about 3 months.

Passionflower Organic Powder I get in bulk and buy the vegetable caps and use this for insomnia. It does not have an effect on benzos or benzo withdrawal for me and from what I understand, it doesn't take the same CYP Pathway as Klonopin (benzo). They do sell non-organic powder, but I prefer knowing I'm not putting pesticides in my body, so I definitely get the organic and so far, the middle sized bag has lasted us 4 months and I'm sure I have another 4 months to go. This is a very inexpesive way to get passionflower.

FOODS:


Flax Seeds I buy from our local health food store in bulk. I crush them up in a coffee blender and use 1 to 2 Tb. a day.


Psyllium Husks I'm starting this week for a soluble fiber which I found will pull out the extra hormones (especially extra adrenaline), toxins, sugars, and all the bad stuff from my body by binding to the bile that needs to get out of my system. The BEST information I have ever seen on this is found HERE.

KAL Organic Stevia Extract is awesome! I've used stevia instead of sugar for a couple years now, but there's always a little aftertaste, but then I found KAL Organic and oh my! What a difference. I spend $9.85 plus shipping for this and it lasts a while.

Coffee Substitute I use instead of coffee because 1. coffee is very hard on the adrenal glands and all systems really, 2. it's hard on my blood sugar levels with the hypoglycemia, and 3. it is known to have pesticides that I don't want to consume which is hard on the liver (though there are organic coffees that use a Swiss Water Process). I use Kaffree Roma as a substitute buying at our local health food store and the canister lasts one month for me.

Ezekiel Bread I use because 1. it's organic, 2. I actually know what is in the bread (go look at your loaf of bread and see the sugars and words you can't pronounce!), and 3. it is good replacement of the bad breads for hypoglycemics and diabetics as it's lower in carbs and there's good fiber in it. I buy mine at the local health food store.

Redmond RealSalt is what my husband and I use now after reading what's wrong with regular table salt and what's right with the stuff God has made. Here's a good book on this subject called "Salt: Your Way to Health" by Dr. David Brownstein. It was such an eye-opener about the lies I've been told, "don't eat too much salt!!!" Now I understand and my doctor has me drinking saltwater in order to raise my aldosterone levels (kind of a "duh" moment for me when I read this book). Book can be found HERE. I think the next book on my list as far as nutrition and getting over this illness is going to be on Iodine which can be found HERE or HERE

Wonderslim Fat Free 99.7% Caffeine Free Cocoa Powder I've not tried this yet but have heard great things about it. I don't know if they use a good water process to remove the caffeine or do what most companies do and use formadehyde. I ordered the Wonderslim recently, but have yet to try it.

TOILETRIES:

Body and Hand Soap I use the Natural (Fragrance-Free) (Milky White Soap) from Sappo Hill Soapworks as it doesn't have toxins and hormones in it like storebought soap. $1.65 per bar of soap.

Tooth Chips I use instead of toothpaste. Toothpaste has fluoride, sodium lauryl sulfate, dyes, artificial sweeteners, silicates (sand), stabilizers or an addition of 60% glycerin found in it. What's all that? Google the words on the back of your toothpaste and see if that's what you want in you and your family's mouth each day! *smile*

Makeup (other than mascara and lipstick) I buy from a lady who makes mineral makeup.

Lipstick I use Ecco Bella so I don't get the toxins and hormones into my system with my makeup.

Macara is Ecco Bella also because I can't stand using mascara with carcinogens which is "is any substance, radionuclide or radiation that is an agent directly involved in the exacerbation of cancer or in the increase of its propagation."

Laundry Soap is handmade by my friend Dana. If you want laundry soap that doesn't have carcinogens in them, contact here HERE or email me and I can get you contact with her. She makes the soap and it lasts and lasts and lasts and I don't have to worry about harmful chemicals for my husand and I.

What I use for shampoo is baking soda and for conditioner, I use vinegar. They both work fine and there's not nasty chemicals that cause cancer in them.

OTHER:

Power Mixer for my benzo withdrawal water titration I have to do each day to get off this medication. This is the best little blender for doing this. I spent $11.75 plus shipping for mine.

The most helpful books I've read to help me understand my illness, how to get better, and overall how to live healthy even if I wasn't sick are:

1. Chronic Fatigue Unmasked 2000 by Gerald Poesnecker, N.D. (free chapter can be found HERE)

2. Salt: Your Way to Health by Dr. David Brownstein

3. Benzodiazepines: How They Work and How to Withdrawal by Dr. Heather Ashton (free online)

3. The Magnesium Miracle by Carolyn Dean, M.D., N.D.

4. Sugar Blues by William F. Duffy

5. What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Menopause by Dr. John R. Lee

6. When God Weeps by Joni Eareckson Tada

The most helpful videos I've found have been:

1. Karen Hurd's LECTURES

2. Videos done by the Citizen's Commission on Human Rights HERE.

3. The Birth of Modern Psychiatry 1 through 4 found HERE.

4. A man going through Klonopin withdrawal without tapering slowly and addressing the other problems related to withdrawal such as adrenal insufficiency (this video is what commonly happens when getting off of benzodiazepines... it happened to me too). It's important to learn how to taper safely. Video HERE and HERE.

5. Ruth's Story of getting off (safe... yeah right) antidepressants.

6. Peter Breggin reports on psychiatric drugs HERE.

7. Food, Inc. was the most helpful in understanding our foods.

8. Super Size Me was helpful in knowing how the body responds to good food and bad food. This man had tests done to see his levels prior to eating fast food. The doctors are in this video too!

9. The Future of Food ... the title says it all! A must see if you are still breathing and require food to exist!

My other blogs can be found HERE and HERE.

Tamara Slack


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005 Snippets of Chapters 1 - 3 of Chronic Fatigue Unmasked 2000 Book

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October 29, 2009

005

I thought I would post some of the highlights of the book I'm reading on Adrenal Fatigue / CFS. It's called "Chronic Fatigue Unmasked 2000." It was written by the doctor who taught my doctor (Dr. Neville in PA) all about this disorder. The author is Dr. Gerald Poesnecker. So here's some snippets I've gleaned from this book that have been very helpful (the quotes are in brown below):

"Whereas six years ago most CFS patients were still considered to be malingering or just downright lazy by most physicians, they are not looked upon as "depressed" and placed on a variety of antidepressants. The use of antidepressants in CFS is like the use of NSAIDS in arthritis. They treat the symptoms but do nothing to correct the real cause of the condition... Thank goodness that there are medical men like Drs. David S. Bell, Paul R. Cheny and Charles W. Lapp who do understand CFS and know that it is not just another form of depression." (pgs ix-x)

Ha! Not just by doctors have I been considered lazy. I've got a host of people who have me down as "lazy" or "crazy" or "depressed" who have given up on me. Good thing Jesus never gave up on His promise to take care of me now and throughout eternity! He cares for the weak and sick. He tells us that He actually chose the weak and despised to inherit life. See:

1 Corinthians 1.26-29: "For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth. But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God."

Also see my post about HOPE.

"The more these patients are given regular treatment, the worse they eventually become." (pg xi)

"I don't know if it's practical to attempt to differentiate between Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Chronic Fatigue Immune Dysfunction. The mere fact that a virus is the stress factor that triggers the Chronic Fatigue reaction does not seem to me now to be such an imortant distinction." (pg xiv)

"The most common symptoms produced by this condition are unexplained exhaustion sometimes alternating with spells of anxiety or panic, a tendency to be oversensitive and/or allergeric to certain substances or environments, a lessening of the ability to reason rationally and to make decisions readily, a tendency toward low blood pressure, sensitivity to cold, poor circulation (cold hands and/or feet), and brain fog or other mental aberrations which can mimic a large variety of mental diseases." (pg 1)

"Personally, I think that much of this medical apathy has been produced by the general vagueness of this disease's character, by the neurotic-like symptoms of its victims and by the slow and tortuous path of its correction even with the best and most advanced therapies. " (pg. 2)

"The "scientific" physician, when confronted with a patient who displays the symptoms of CFS, has a ready answer: "The patient is depressed, neurotic, mildly psychotic, unmotivated or just bored with life." This that self-satisfied stance that can be a "badge of our trib," the patient is given a tranquilizer, antidepressant or both, and with the fatherly advice to stop worrying and to go to work he is sent home. It is just as impractical to tell a tubercular patient to go and play football as it is to tell a CFS patient to stop worrying. Am I exaggerating? Am I a little too hard on my medical contemproaries? One has only to remember that a short time ago patients were literally bled to death in an efford to satisfy this medical ego." (pg 3)

Here's what Wikipedia says about George Washington:
"George Washington asked to be bled heavily after he developed a throat infection from weather exposure. Almost 4 pounds (1.7 liters) of blood was withdrawn, much of it without a doctor's supervision, contributing to his death in 1799."

Yeah! And now docs are telling us to take a bunch of anti-anxiety (benzodiazepine) drugs and anti-depressants which are killing us. See videos HERE.

"Most chronic CFS patients are considered by their friends, relatives and health practioners - the people from whom they seek aid - to be suffering from some form of mental or psychological disturbance... One of the first and most important tasks of our therapy is to convice them that this is not true. Unless we accomplish this, treatment is difficult and sometimes nearly impossible. Many of these patients are called schizophrenic, some paranoiac, some manic-depressive, and most are called neurotic... chronic CFS can mimic the symptom patterns of all of these medical conditions." (pg 53)

I've been diagnosed with everything under the sun by doctors who never tested anything in my body. I was given about 12 different kinds of drugs including the very addictive drug, Klonopin for nearly 15 years, hospitalized (yes, mental hospitals!) and told I would probably kill myself. Had they just looked into the endocrine system and asked, "why is this happening?" they would have seen I've been very, very sick for a long time and needed their help, not their destructive drugs.

"Counseling, even by the best of physicians, often has little effect on these patients. About the only help at the present time for this patient is an active treatment of the general adaptive system to improve the oxygen-carrying power ot the tissues of the brain so that it can again function in a more rational manner." (pg 57)

"Somewhere in the life of a CFS patient there has to be a rock-stable person to offer support and sustenance, or his whole existence is built on constantly shifting sands... One of the most common symptoms of the chronic CFS patient is a feeling that he has an illness that no one can understand ant that no one has had before. Friends and relatives assure him that they have never heard of anything like it." (pg 60)

My husband, Roger, is that rock-stable person the Lord has given me. He does everything he can to alleviate the stresses in my life, even if that means he has to cook something for me and let me lay in bed or hold me while I'm crying and in pain. He defends me when his family members have called me names and laughed at me. I love him very much for all the sacrifices he has made on my behalf.

"Many individuals who are drained of energy by those around them feel that they are victims of agoraphobia, that is, fear of crowds, mainly because when they are in a crowd, they find they they grow weak and anxious. Generally this is not true agoraphobia, but merely the draining effect, or what I call the "leeching effect" that crowds have on CFS patients. This is one of the earliest symptom patterns I usually notice in CFS cases... If there is a function the CFS patient wishes to or must attend, however, we suggest that he remain for as short a time as possible... even events and circumstances that the patient enjoys or that might be a happy surprise fatigue and weaken him. A surprise birthday party, a visit from a long-forgotten friend, or a telephone call from a sweetheart - all of these things strengthen the body and spirt of almost everyone except the CFS patient. This is perhaps the saddest component of the entire condition." (pg 61-63)

It is interesting that agoraphobia is one of the first things I had from my late teens on through the years. It's even worse now, but now I realize it's produced from weakened adrenals (that will heal!). Psychiatrists always said it was fear I had and that I could talk myself out of it. For over 15 years, I tried what they said. Fail! It didn't work. I would tell them it wasn't until I got into the group of people or whatever that I started feeling drained and anxious. Anyway, now I know what's going on in my body. My weakened system just can't handle the normal stresses of life (even good stresses) until I heal these little adrenal glands. Then I will be able to handle the normal stresses that non-adrenal patients can handle. Until then, I cannot put myself in those situations because I would be going backwards in my healing of my body.

My other blogs can be found HERE and HERE.

The original post for this daily diary began HERE.

Coram Deo,
Tamara Slack

Are antidepressants addictive?

Doctors say "no." Most people on them say, "yes." Check out Ruth's story and see what most doctors deny. She's one of many accidental addicts (this is part one of two videos):